“Hashing is a state of mind – a friendship of kindred spirits, joined together for the sole purpose of reliving their childhood, releasing the tension of everyday life and generally acting a fool amongst others, who will not judge you or measure you by anything more than your sense of humour”
Global Trash Hash Bible
Random Hash Reflections – warts, mishtakes and all
Four weeks back from holidays and time for a few reflections on the recent past, the immediate future and the time to come.
First up, Run No. 1290 - Easter Monday and fresh and portly from three weeks of overindulgence in the land of perennial weather, it was time to dust off the crusty old jockstrap (must wash it one of these years. Ed), put on the even older takkies and getmeself and herself out to Kgale Siding for another masterpiece from SECOND COMING and VIAGRA (or should that be VIAGRETTE).
A bit late, but as SPACE CADET was immediately behind and the Hash demonstrated its usual reluctance to start without yours truly, there was still time to sign up, loosen up the ever stiffening sinews (sinews RIPPER – sinews – mind like sewer that one Ed.) before lumbering into a steady gallop and following the FRB’s right up the first of many backchecks. Once across the railway the trail wend a circuitous route through scrub bush and past sundry dwellings, with the regular checks, false trails and backchecks turning the pack around. Just occasionally the trail appeared to disappear (“Don’t look at me” quoth SECOND COMING “I didn’t set this bit”), but eventually a recent first for 2007, the trail led up – yes up – a small hill to pause amongst a cluster of rocks in a wooded glade. Hold Check whilst the dafter souls climbed to a view point at the rocky summit. “Ooh look – there’s the dam” and other cries of wondrous delight echoed across the landscape, before all regained the CHECK and with a little searching found the out trail for an gentle amble to the BEER STOP!!! Welcome break for a coldtinnie and a chance to marvel at the RIPPER falling over without taking a drink. From the BEER STOP it was a short stroll to the L/S split and ON IN to the beer. Excellent run to round off the Easter Weekend.
In the circle, enlivened with Gin Jelly, Tamara and Indra were duly christened SMOKEY and THE BANDIT and Phil and Nancy were awarded the distinctive hash handles of STANLEY (a.k.a Dr Livingstone I Presume) and BLIKSEM.
Circle over, distribution of chocolate Easter Eggs, social drinking and all around the tables for a braai. Out came the schnapps, mampoer, etc and away went the senses.
A satisfactory end to the weekend and welcome back!!!
Second up –Run 1291 - well I missed that one as the option of joining an old friend in celebrating three score proved to be more attractive.
Third up – Run 1292. From SMOKEY’S Den in the Village the trail first made for the Old Prison before circling around with some tricky false trails to a check outside the Village “Mall?”. Trail went three different ways before the real trail was raised round the back of the petrol station and gently motored on into the local forest. Here it became clear that the Hares were just a tad short of local knowledge as the trail lead deeper into the woods (No bears picnicking today) before circling back to where it all started at the back of the petrol station. – (“Take a memo Miss Moneypenny – there is an impenetrable fencecircumbobulating the woods) - hence the scuffed trail marks as the Hares had attempted disguise their balls up.
Quiet amusement and a bit o’ cussing as the FRB’s and the Chatpack past each other within metres going in opposite directions on opposite sides of the impenetrable fence – impenetrable to all except JOCK and Lars who engaging Warthog mode made like a flatdogand slid under same fence, courtesy of a handy slit trench.
On round the back of the Gabs Club, past the university and eventually ON IN to the …. Well it would have been nice if the was beer at the end of the rainbow but it appeared that keys to the Beerwagon were still out on trail!!! A rapidly dessicating pack had no option but to stand around making small talk and cursing – except for JOCK who had brought his own – gradually weakening until some hours later the keys appeared and all was well with the world again. Circle up – the Hashendales - THE BANDIT, CATTLEPROD and ROADKILL (what is this Dildo brand he has on his shorts?) were all sinned for displaying their bodies – or not in CATTLEPRODS case. Various other sins given out in an attempt to get rid of four month-old Sangria (plenty of body with all the dead bees, etc that found it enticing.). Circle over and one option was to head for the Dulce Café – mental note from those whattook this option – explain in works of one syllable to SMOKEY that unlicenced doesn’t mean the owner can’t drive but “NO BEER”.
Good lung clearing run!!!
Fourth up: Run 1293 – Behind the Oasis Motel – What an amazingly brilliant run.
A fresh post-cold front morning with the smoke from the burning rubbish-tip climbing gracefully into the sky. Eventually SPACE CADET turns up and off the pack went into the depths of scrub and woodland twisting and turning, past the “It’s not dead it just resting” dog, hither and thither, down the fence line – wrong way – back into the thorn scrub, morebackchecks, through a hole in the fence into the quarry – wrong way - back into the thorn scrub – wrong way - through the front entrance to the quarry, up and down the moonscape hillocks, limbo under the fence and away on the L/S options. The L option ran on through long and short scrub, down an ancient elephant trail in and out of a riverbed and eventually ON! IN! to the beer – keys on time this time. Good Hash country that had not been visited for some time. Visitors from Jaccy Hash welcomed, sins awarded.
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